Preached at Cornerstone Church Men's and Women's Breakfast on June 20, 2015

Open your Bibles to Hebrews 12:1-4. Let us read it, pray, and then wrap up or study on God's Design for Men and Women.

• Hebrews 12:1-4 – “Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, 2looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. 3Consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted. 4In your struggle against sin you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood.
  
  

We love to claim we are Christians. We love to claim we have faith. We love to claim we believe in the Bible. However, words are just words. They are easily spoken and easily forgotten. In fact, I believe this is the current status of a vast majority of Christians today, they are at best nominal Christians; Christians in name only. When it comes to lining up our lives with what the Bible says, we have a tendency to ignore it, reject it, or twist it.

We forget that to be a Christian is to first and foremost recognize that we are sinful, fallen, desperately sick, broken creatures. Our life, prior to being born again is out of step with our Maker. When God births us into spiritual existence, our new inclination is to “work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure.” The power of the Gospel is to justify and to sanctify. Meaning that the death of Christ sufficiently pays for all of our sin, and there is nothing left for us to do so as to be reconciled to God. However, the Gospel does not merely justify us, it puts us into motion towards becoming in sync with God's will.

The gospel breaks the chains of our sinfulness and gives us freedom and desire to pursue what pleases God. This is the essence of or text this morning to “lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us.” This morning I want to talk about two things 1) The Race and 2) the Weights.

The Race

So what is this race that we are running? First, let us understand that the terrain for this race is not the streets of gold found in Heaven, but the muck and the mire of this World. God has ordained that the starting line for our life in Christ begins in a fallen world. This is not a perfect illustration but it may help, it is as if we are running in sand. And not only are we running in sand, but people watching us run are not predominately fans of ours. They are hecklers, scoffers, booers, perhaps at times, even obstacles. For some people, the race actually becomes a gauntlet of sorts.

This was the case for the cloud of witnesses that surround us that are spoken about in Hebrews 12:1. These cloud of witnesses are listed in Chapter 11 we are told their stories involve lions, sacrifice, war, torture, mockery, flogging, chains, imprisonment, afflicted and mistreated. Despite all those difficulties, they endured, they kept running the race.

So what race were they running? They were running the race of faith. It is a race that centered around the promises of God. To each of them, the word of God was proclaimed, God's will was revealed, strategy and design were laid out before them, and each one of them had a choice to make in their life, believe God and run the race, or not believe God and blend into the world.

We have spent months soaking in Biblical text seeking the will of God when it comes to men and women. Our study has led us to one single reality, God has a specific design for men, and God has a specific design for women. Both male and female are equal before God. God loves men and women equally and delights in men and women equally, but we have different callings.

I don’t know how you can walk away from this study and think otherwise, for we looked at scripture after scripture from the beginning to the end and it all pointed to an intentional God with an intentional design. Starting in the Garden, running through the Old Testament, examining the words of Jesus, looking at the early Church, reading the letters of Paul, and studying the remaining letters. All of it pointed to an unchanging God who has ordained unchanging roles.

So the question is no longer what does the Bible say about my role as a man, and my role as a women, for we know what its says. The question is, are you willing to run the race of faith when it comes these roles, when it comes to God's design? Are you willing to trust in God’s plan for you as a male, and God’s plan for you as a female? Are you willing to trust in God’s designed for marriage? Are you willing to trust God’s has designed for the home? Are you willing to trust God’s design for His Church?

At this point, this is really the question before us. Will you chose to run the race of faith? We have stared in the mirror of God’s Word, will we turn and forget what we saw? Will we run the race, or will we go sit in the stands? Or perhaps we will run for a little while, and then we will give up because it is just too hard in this day in age? Maybe the Word of God will sprout up in our lives, but it will be chocked out by the cares of this world, or persecution from your family and “friends.”

The Weight

What I want to do this morning is to convince you, or remind you, that God’s design for male and female is not a burden, it is not a punishment. It is a design that God declared in Genesis 1:31 to be “very good.” That word good in verse 31 is “tob” which can be translated to pleasing, well, pleasant, delightful, glad, joyful, delicious, sweet. God’s design for men and women is a design that fits. It is a design that complements. It is a design that is harmonious. It is a design the best displays what God desires to be displayed.

I think we as Christians forget this. We see the walk of faith only as difficult, and we fail to see the joy, and peace, and fullness of a life when you are surrendered entirely to your Father. We forget that God promises that truth sets us free, and that there is freedom in implementing God’s design. We fail to recognize the fruit that will come from a life planted by the streams of God’s Word. We must recognize that the weight of this life, is not obedience, but disobedience.

What is the must regular response to the question, how have you been? “Busy.” That is the main response. “We are really busy.” You can see it in people's eyes, they are scattered in their lives and scattered in their hearts. This is a weight upon their shoulders. It drags them down. It makes the race of this life wearisome. I can't help but think the main reason for this is that we are out of sync with God's design for our lives.

Instead of men being at home and leading their wives and children, they are working 50+ hours a week, golfing, watching endless sports, or wasting their life away in a man cave. Instead of men stepping up and leading Church's they shrink in the back and make jokes about the women doing it. They send them out into the world to make money so that you can have a bigger truck. Men are universally failing to be the men that God designed them to be. Gone seem to be the days of valiance. Homes and Churches are now full of 40 year old adolescents.

Women, you have bought into the lie of feminism that equality means being the same. Equality does not mean the same. There is no doubt that men and women are different. Why in the world did we think we can fit them into the same mold? You have pursued the path of man, and you are now doing twice as much work and burning the candles at both ends. Your kids are being raised by secular strangers, and you and your husband are always fighting because the house is always a wreck, you never eat as a family, and the two hours you get the your children is spent carting them around to keep up with the world. And at the end of the night, the last thing you are thinking about is intimacy.

With all this said, we wonder why marriages don't last. And we wonder why Church's are slipping into liberalism, where anything goes. We have ignored, rejected, or twisted the Word of God.

The Call

But it doesn't have to be this way for us. We don't have to go the way of the world, and be deceived. We can chose today to lay aside every weight that is clinging to us and run the race that God has expressly set before us. Will it be easy? Absolutely not. God hardly ever calls us into things that are easy. The life of a Christian is described as a fight of faith. We must work out our salvation. We must strive down the narrow path. We must pick up our cross and follow Christ.

So this is my call as we end this series. Each of you make a concerted effort to live out what you have been studying. Pray that God would reveal to you areas that are out of sync with God's will. Then take steps in your life to fulfill God's design for you as a man and a women. It doesn't have to be all at once. Each month do something that moves you in the right direction.

Men, start seeing your home as your Garden of Eden and stand guard against Satan's attack on you, your wife, and your kids. Pay attention to what is on the TV, Computer, mailbox, and phone. Set loving rules and boundaries. Be willing to lay down your life for your wife by reducing your work hours, eliminating your TV time, or giving up a hobby or two. Start leading your family in prayer and devotionals. Look for ways that you can step up to the plate at Church. Encourage other men to be men. Make the choice to stop being apathetic, and instead choose to be a fellow solider in Christ.

Women, think about how you can come up along side and help your husbands and the Church. Be Holy Spirit like, who comes and goes without being seen, but you know that he was there because you can see the effects. Think about how you can make the dance more beautiful. Unleash your God given creativity and live, not as a slave to feminism, but as a slave to Jesus Christ. Make your home a gospel centered home, focus your attention on training up your children in righteousness. Love your husband, encourage your husband, respect your husband.

Lastly, let us, let God be God. Let us submit to Him above all. Let us not think we are entitled to a certain way of life that we believe is the best. Let us run the race of faith and trust in God's design, let us trust in God's Word, and let us endure for the joy that is set before us when we stand in the presence of our Maker and we here him say well done good and faithful servant.

 

Preached at Cornerstone Church in Cascade, IA on April 6, 2014 

Today we continue our walk through the greatest sermon ever preached, The Sermon on the Mount. The sermon was of course preached by none other than Jesus himself, and it is jam packed with no-nonsense truth. To use a phrase from John MacArthur, the Sermon on the Mount presents a picture of Jesus that you cannot ignore.

Today we are going to talk about divorce. Before we get started I want to say that I am completely aware that this sermon may make some of you uncomfortable, and I want you to know that my intention is not to make people feel awkward. My intention is to teach the Bible. My prayer this week and today is that I speak with gentleness and grace, but that I do not strip God's Word of its truth. Lastly, as I stated last week while teaching on adultery, we must start with the understanding that we are all sinners; you, me, and everyone that walks through this door. There is no place for self-righteousness here. So as we unpack this text and discuss the topic of divorce no one should feel that I, or anyone else, have a moral high ground over you or anyone else. We are all wretched and desperately need the Grace of God found in Jesus Christ.

Today, like always, we have a lot to cover, so lets get to work. Turn with me to Matthew 5:31-32. Let us read it, pray for God's Grace, and soak in God's Word.

• Matthew 5:31-32 - “"It was also said, 'Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.' 32 But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.”

Marriage. If there ever was a lighting rod of an institution it is marriage. I would like to say that this day in age is unique, but it isn't. Controversy is always surrounding it. Ever since the fall in the Garden of Eden, marriage has always been under attack. In my opinion, the existence of the constant war on marriage is evidence of Satan’s hate of what it displays.

You can easily get a sense of this pervasive tension when you look at our text today. 2000 years ago Jesus was addressing the institution of marriage. Why was He addressing it? Because the Scribes and the Pharisees had mad a mess of marriage. Just like we saw over the last two Sundays when looking at murder and adultery, Jesus as setting things straight.

In order for us to understand our text, we need to first understand marriage. In order to do that, we need to look at a couple other passages. First turn with me to Matthew 19:1-12

• Matthew 19:1–12 - “1 Now when Jesus had finished these sayings, he went away from Galilee and entered the region of Judea beyond the Jordan. 2 And large crowds followed him, and he healed them there. 3 And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, "Is it lawful to divorce one's wife for any cause?" 4 He answered, "Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, 5 and said, 'Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'? 6 So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate." 7 They said to him, "Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?" 8 He said to them, "Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery." 10 The disciples said to him, "If such is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry." 11 But he said to them, "Not everyone can receive this saying, but only those to whom it is given. 12 For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let the one who is able to receive this receive it."

In Matthew 19 we can better observe the controversy of marriage at the time of Jesus. The Pharisees are testing Jesus and are looking for a line in the sand. They want to know what reasons are valid in getting a divorce; when is it acceptable to leave your spouse? At that time there were several schools of thought regarding when divorce was acceptable, and to be honest the different positions are not important. What is important is that in these verse we get a window into how God sees marriage.

First, Jesus makes it abundantly clear that marriage is created by God himself. It is not something that humanity, or culture, or the government invented. It is a relationship intentionally designed, created and implemented by God.

• Matthew 19:4-6 - “He answered, "Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, 5 and said, 'Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'? 6 So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate."

Jesus reaches all the way back to the creation event of the making of a man and a women and states, without hesitation, that it is God who created this union between husband and wife. How do we know this? Because the Bible tells us so, and now Jesus tells us so. And if that is not enough proof regarding the origin of marriage, just look back on all human history across the entire globe. The God designed union between husband and wife is everywhere. Wherever there is a person created in God’s image, there is an marital union displaying God’s design. If God did not design, create, and implement marriage than how do you explain its 100% prevalence throughout time, throughout cultures, and throughout the world. As I have said before, we are surrounded by the evidence of God.

The second thing we see it that this union of marriage is significantly strong. In fact, there is no other relationship on the planet between two humans that is stronger than the husband and wife. Not even the bond between parent and child is as strong as husband and wife. For a child leaves his parents and is unified with his or her spouse.

• Matthew 19:5-6 – “'Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'? 6 So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate."

The parent child relationship is designed to come to an end at the moment of marriage. The greater of the unions trumps the lesser, and in this union there is a oneness. There is a deep abiding. There is nothing like it on the planet between to people.

With these two points in front of us, the question is now, why did God design a relationship between a male and female that is so prevalent in the world and so strong between the couple? What is the primary purpose of God in marriage?

This question is rarely asked and rarely answered, and because it is not asked many Christians are succumbing to divorce. I think the reason this question is rarely asked is because we are too busy asking the wrong question. We are asking the sames questions that the Pharisees were asking, when can I get a divorce? We are wanting to know what box can we check on the certificate of divorce application form. The reason we do this, is because our hearts are hard, just like the Pharisees. We make marriage all about our pleasure, and not about God's glory. This is the central issue that Jesus was addressing in Matthew 5 and Matthew 19.

• Matthew 19:8 – “He said to them, "Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. “

Every marital problem that has ever existed between every single husband and wife can be attributed to your hard heart. If you are having trouble in your marriage today, the reason is not because of your spouse, it is because of you. You are the problem. I am the problem.

Our hearts are too much like the Pharisees and not enough like Jesus’. Instead of showering my wife with self-sacrificing love, and grace and forgiveness, I rain down on her self-justifying anger. Every fight that I find myself in with my wife is about my pride. It is about my agenda. It is about my pleasures. It is about me. My sin is the problem, but this is not what God had originally designed. Before the fall, divorce was not a word in Adam and Eve’s vocabulary. What God had joined, let no man separate.

So the question is still before us? What is God’s purpose in designing, creating, and implementing marriage? Turn with me to Ephesians 5:28. There is no one in the Bible that talks about marriage more than Paul, who by the way was not married. Interestingly enough, just like Jesus. So for all you single people, marriage is important to understand, and it is important because of what it displays.

• Ephesians 5:28-33 – “In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31"Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”

We are told in Ephesians 5 that the purpose of marriage is the living display, or image, of the union between Jesus and the Church. Let me say that again, so you don’t miss it. The reason God designed, created, and implemented marriage between a man and a women was to be a living display, or image, of the union between Jesus and the Church. That is why it exists. Man and women are created in the image of God and marriage is created in the image of redemption.

Marriage is not a societal thing. It is not a cultural thing. It is a gospel thing. This is what marriage symbolizes, and this is why Satan hates it. This is why marriage is always under attack. A husband and a wife joined together forever, bound by God Himself is to be an image of Jesus’ unending love of his people, and this image of redemption is to cover the Earth. And Ephesians 5 is not the only place that points to this reality.

John the Baptist who was to set the stage for Jesus refers to Jesus as the bridegroom:

• John 3:29 – “The one who has the bride is the bridegroom. The friend of the bridegroom, who stands and hears him, rejoices greatly at the bridegroom's voice. Therefore this joy of mine is now complete. “

Jesus calls himself the bridegroom:

• Mark 2:19 – “And Jesus said to them, "Can the wedding guests fast while the bridegroom is with them? As long as they have the bridegroom with them, they cannot fast. 20 The days will come when the bridegroom is taken away from them, and then they will fast in that day.”
• Matthew 22:1-2-“And again Jesus spoke to them in parables, saying, 2 "The kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who gave a wedding feast for his son”

Listen to what takes place in Heaven after all the elect have been saved. This is the party we all long to be a part of.

• Revelation 19:6-9 – “Then I heard what seemed to be the voice of a great multitude, like the roar of many waters and like the sound of mighty peals of thunder, crying out, "Hallelujah! For the Lord our God the Almighty reigns. 7 Let us rejoice and exult and give him the glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and his Bride has made herself ready; 8 it was granted her to clothe herself with fine linen, bright and pure"--for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints. 9 And the angel said to me, "Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb." And he said to me, "These are the true words of God."

The bride is the Church and the bridegroom is Christ. Lastly, listen to what Jesus says about marriage in eternity. I think this is very helpful in wrapping our minds around this.

• Matthew 22:29-30 – “But Jesus answered them, "You are wrong, because you know neither the Scriptures nor the power of God.30 For in the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage, but are like angels in heaven. 

Many people don't know this, but Jesus tells us bluntly that your marriage is not forever. Marriage is only a temporary thing. Why? Why did God design marriage to only exist until Christ's return? Because the greater union absorbs the lesser. union No longer does their need to be a living display, or image, pointing to the greater reality, for we will be enjoying the greater reality. The wedding of Christ and his bride, the Church, will have taken place and we will be living the full consummation of our union with Jesus. The symbol dissolves when the real thing arrives.

I think God is making it abundantly clear what he is doing. He is telling us expressly and implicitly that marriage is a picture of the Gospel, and we should not be surprised that God has designed it this way.

For when God created he had a purpose in His mind. His purpose was not to create a random world with little to no meaning, but instead he created a world that pointed to the glory of His Son, Jesus Christ.

• Colossians 1:16 – “For by him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities--all things were created through him and for him.“ 
  

All things means, all things. That means marriage is created for Jesus, and as I have hopefully shown through God’s Word, it is not only for Him, but it is a very specific living display of the love that exists between Jesus and the Church. It is a living display of the union between Jesus and His Church.

Let us know talk about this union. The union between Jesus and his people is unbreakable. It is eternal. It never fails. It never gives up. It endures. God himself has joined the bridegroom with his bride. Salvation by Grace through faith is a union sealed by God. Listen to these verses.

• John 6:37 – “All that the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never cast out. “
• John 10:28 – “I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand. “
• Matthew 28:20 – “And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.”
• Ephesians 4:30 – “And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.“
• Romans 8:35 – “For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 39 nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

If you ask me, these verses sound like wedding vows. These verses are promises. When Christ says I will never cast out, he means it. Divorce is not a word when it comes to marriage to Christ. The union is not held together by paper, it is sealed by the power of God; the same power that binds the trinity. If you have been ransomed by Jesus Christ, you are his forever. Jesus will not divorce you, and therefore we should not divorce our spouse.

And this brings us full circle. This is why God hates divorce; because it blows up the picture of the Gospel. Every marriage that ends in divorce displays the opposite message that God intended. Divorce does not display that grace of God, it displays the sinfulness of man. This is why Satan is always attempting to destroy it.

Matthew 5 is not about adultery. It is not about the line in the sand, or the check box on the certificate of divorce. It is about your heart. Do you want to display the Gospel? Or do you want to display your sinful pleasures? Let us not repeat their mistake. Let us live the Gospel so that Glory of God shines forth in this lost and broken world!